{"id":1157,"date":"2010-10-09T17:23:00","date_gmt":"2010-10-10T00:23:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/averagejoecyclist.com\/?p=1157"},"modified":"2015-01-20T15:03:28","modified_gmt":"2015-01-20T23:03:28","slug":"really-funny-cyclophobe","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/averagejoecyclist.com\/really-funny-cyclophobe\/","title":{"rendered":"Laughing at Cyclophobes"},"content":{"rendered":"

Seems like it\u2019s my week for laughing at road rage and cyclophobes. I posted “Laughing at Road Rage”<\/a> a couple of days ago, and then just a few minutes ago a rabid cyclophobe caused great hilarity for me and my entire family.<\/p>\n

For those of you who don\u2019t know, there\u2019s this person on the web called Alex Tsakumis who writes horrific stories about trying to kill cyclists,<\/strong> while his kids are in the car<\/strong>. That in itself clearly is not<\/strong> funny (in fact it sounds like something Child Welfare and the police should be investigating).<\/p>\n

But he also ponders why women don\u2019t want to have sex with him … and if you do happen to have a look at his website, you\u2019ll see a slideshow of photos of him, and get an insight into the workings of his mind\u00a0\u2013 and you\u2019ll probably be able to figure\u00a0that<\/strong> mystery\u00a0out pretty quickly. But my advice is, don\u2019t bother \u2013 which is why I am not even posting a link.<\/p>\n

In any event, I probably shouldn\u2019t have bothered myself, but I guess I was bored and had nothing better to do, so I posted a comment. This was my comment (as near as I can remember):<\/p>\n

Mmm, first time I have seen your wondrous, uplifting prose. I feel moved to quote Shakespeare:
\n\u201cWhat a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals\u201d \u2026 although come to think of it, perhaps I should have truncated that at \u201cWhat a piece of work \u2026\u201d
\n<\/span>In any event, two comments:
\n1. You say \u201cAnd then I got to thinking: If women are so good at multi-tasking, how come they can\u2019t have a headache and sex at the same time?\u201d Mmm\u00a0…\u00a0I suspect it has nothing to do with multi-tasking:\u00a0most women are really discriminating about who they have sex with, and hate-filled bullies tend to be really low on their list.
\n<\/span>2. I see you go out of your way to punish misbehaving cyclists by running them off the road with your big old car. So I\u2019m wondering, when you see misbehaving motorists, do you also try to run them<\/strong> off the road, with your kids in the car? How about when drivers of buses and semi\u2019s break the law \u2013 do you try to shove them into a ditch with your car, or jump out of your car and hit them with your little baseball bat? I suspect not, because bullies only attack the comparatively weak and defenseless, don\u2019t they? So if for example my 9-year-old daughter broke some kind of law on her bike \u2013 say, forgot to signal a turn \u2013 then you\u2019d be happy to ram her into a ditch with your car, thus teaching your lucky children another lesson in life. But if a driver of a semi made a dangerous and illegal move, I\u2019m guessing you\u2019re not going to be attacking him with your car, right?<\/span><\/p>\n

In any event, that\u2019s what I tried<\/strong> to post, wanting to see if he had the courage to post it (because I had noticed that he only publishes admiring posts).\u00a0Unsurprisingly, he did\u00a0not<\/strong> have the courage. Instead, this is the version he posted:<\/p>\n

Mmm, first time I have seen your wondrous, uplifting prose. I feel moved to quote Shakespeare:
\n\u201cWhat a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals\u201d \u2026 although come to think of it, perhaps I should have truncated that at \u201cWhat a piece of work \u2026\u201d
\nIn any event, two comments:
\n1. You say \u201cAnd then I got to thinking: If women are so good at multi-tasking, how come they can\u2019t have a headache and sex at the same time?\u201d \u2026 (EDITED DUE TO PERSONAL ATTACK\u2013TYPICAL OF CYCLING ANARCHISTS)
\n2. (EDITED SUE TO PROJECTION OF HATE AGAINST BLGO OWNER AND OFFENSIVE COMMENTS ABOUT PARENTING)<\/span><\/p>\n

First I was really amused by his spelling. And I found it hilarious that while he can dish out abuse in bucket loads, he can\u2019t take any criticism himself. But what really cracked us all<\/strong> up<\/strong> was his response to me:<\/p>\n

AGT<\/span><\/em> says:
\nAnd I, too, am moved to quote someone, specifically Rodney Dangerfield. \u201cWhy don\u2019t you play hide and go f@#k yourself?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

We found it really funny<\/strong> that a guy who is so full of\u00a0 hatred that he is training his kids to kill cyclists (and bragging about it on the internet) would get so angry at my (comparatively) mild critique. And I have to\u00a0admit it pleased me that I had made him so angry \u2013 one small jab back on behalf of the cyclists he has attacked with his car!<\/p>\n

But that’s it for me\u00a0\u2013 just like I avoid keeping poison in my kitchen, I resolve not to ever again go to his poisonous web site … no matter how bored I get!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Seems like it\u2019s my week for laughing at road rage and cyclophobes. I posted “Laughing at Road Rage” a couple of days ago, and then just a few minutes ago a rabid cyclophobe caused great hilarity for me and my entire family. For those of you who don\u2019t know, there\u2019s this person on the web […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9096,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[108,171,183],"tags":[25,21],"class_list":{"0":"post-1157","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-bike-safety","8":"category-cycling-infrastructure","9":"category-metro-vancouver-bike-routes","10":"tag-crazy-cyclophobes","11":"tag-yeah-i-wanna-cycle-without-getting-killed","12":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nLaughing at Cyclophobes • Average Joe Cyclist<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/averagejoecyclist.com\/really-funny-cyclophobe\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Laughing at Cyclophobes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Seems like it\u2019s my week for laughing at road rage and cyclophobes. 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